"I LOVE TECHNOLOGY, BUT NOT AS MUCH AS YOU, YOU SEE...BUT I STILL LOVE TECHNOLOGY...ALWAYS AND FOREVER..." - KIP FROM "NAPOLEON DYNAMITE"

Which is one of my most favorite movies of all time. But I digress...

I am having a love affair.

Oh Steve, before you go out and buy the shotgun or contact the divorce lawyer, let me put your mind at ease. It is a love affair with a piece of technology which, as a mother and busy woman, I have come to rely upon as my constant companion, and general support system.

Yes readers, I am referring to my iPhone.

Oh, iPhone, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways...

You are my system of checks-and-balances. One look at my calendar, which automatically syncs with my computer sans cords, and I know if I am keeping everything in my schedule on the up-and-up. You make sure that I never overlook anything, whether it be a birthday, doctor's appointment, or most importantly, that Bruce Springsteen tickets go on sale on September 25th.

You are my moral compass (or at least, just my regular old compass, anyway). You help me find my way in this world with such ease and dependability, and for that, I am grateful. Whether I'm driving sans human co-pilot to Delaware for a wedding or finding a good back-route to the outlets, your awesome GPS never steers me wrong. However, you don't ever judge my value system for sometimes using you to look up celebrity gossip on People, TMZ, UsWeekly, or Perez Hilton.

I love how you never question my intelligence or make me feel stupid. By making yourself so simple, all it took for me to get hooked was to plug you in just once to my computer. Somehow, you just knew what I wanted you to know, found it yourself, and put yourself together. Do you know what an amazing gift that is to give to a mother of a toddler and infant? And when you once got accidentally dropped into a cocktail one evening, you never cried or got mad. I almost did, but then recovered when you were replaced (for free, natch) by the lovely people at our local Apple store.

I am more adventurous with you in my life. I have even been brave enough to cook dishes I haven't cooked before just by following the recipe I looked up on Safari and using a kitchen conversion scale to recalculate the ingredients so that we didn't end up with 40 pounds of leftovers. Heck, the fact that I was cooking at all makes my husband want to hug all of the people at the Apple store one-by-one.

You have a gift for distracting children at the times when it counts the most. In stores, in traffic, in doctors' offices, or while I take that shower that I desperately need - you provide precious minutes so that I can gain clarity myself. It could be a video of my friends' first dance at their wedding, a learning game, or the PBS Sprout app, but whatever it is, you consistently deliver.

If it weren't illegal, I would set you on a table in my house while the girls slept and trust you to babysit the girls while I snuck out on a date with my husband. The only issue I see with this would be if you needed to call 911 in case of a fire, but then again, there is probably an app for that, too.

You have a brilliant memory of all the fun moments in life. All I have to do is open my Camera Roll and instantly a smile crosses my lips. Whether it's a photo of Caroline on the swing at the park, Molly snuggled up and sleeping, or Steve and me having cocktails at the Chinatown Hooters (yes, you read that right - there IS a Hooters in Chinatown, and YES, their signage was written in Chinese, and YES, it was the only thing open and still seating late-night that evening, and YES, their wings are UH-MAY-ZING!), after seeing Chelsea Handler live, it's just amazing how happy you can make me in an instant. And now that you have fabulous video capabilities since Steve got the new 3GS and traded me for my older, video-less model, it's even better!

My dearest iPhone, please don't have hurt feelings that I cast your older, more mature version aside so easily - you are so idiot-proof that I was able to simply remove your memory card and put you into the newer, better body. Kind of like plastic surgery - which I am totally not opposed to, by the way (and either way, I know you won't judge me if I ever decide to go for that post-baby tummy tuck - you'll likely give me the directions to the plastic surgeon's office, help me check out his credentials, and find me the perfect post-surgery bathing suit).

While I was initially scared to even enter into a relationship with you because of the necessary switch to AT&T Wireless (Shock! Scandal! - as most of my friends and family are on Verizon), you have proven with your dependibility that I have made the right choice, and I will never stray as long as you don't...

CONTAIN YOURSELF!

Last week, I was watching an episode of "Oprah" (at 1 in the morning while nursing the baby - thank God for good late-night television to keep me awake!) that featured clutter expert Peter Walsh tackling yet another set of viewers' messes. This time, he was helping one couple organize their car, which Oprah had secretly shipped to the studio for all the world to see (it was pretty bad), and some fraternity brothers clean out their frat house bedroom (now this was downright disgusting!). I was really motivated by Peter Walsh, mainly because he gave really straightforward, simple steps for decluttering any space. I headed to Oprah's website and found some really great de-cluttering "homework" for different rooms that Walsh guarantees will have your house cleaned out in 6 months.

While our house is generally in pretty good shape, my home office is one of the last bastions of disorganization, mainly because it never really got properly put together when we moved in August. I am actually excited to tackle the mess after seeing this episode and checking out the website. The best part of it all is that Oprah has gotten the Container Store to offer a 25% discount off your total purchase from now until April 13. I've set this as my own deadline for getting my office in order - mainly because I want to justify my buying some new cute organizational gear. Hey - if shopping is what motivates me, why fight it?

RANDOM THOUGHTS...

So I am sitting here in my den, and it's 12:30 in the morning. I'm working to print a stationery order for my best friend and business partner Christy, who just had her third adorable baby. She and I timed this whole pregnancy thing perfectly, didn't we? Our newest kids will be close enough in age to hopefully be the best of friends like their mommies, while at the same time there's one of us available to hold down the fort with our company while the other gives birth/recovers. I'm really excited about how her announcement/Christmas card has turned out (I mean, they are such a cute family that coming up with a design and layout was easy):

I want to be able to get these to her tomorrow so that she could send them out ASAP - she's the friend who literally times it so that her card arrives before anyone else's on the first day of December, so it's practically killing her that they are not out yet. She pays no mind that she had a c-section literally nine days ago. I, on the other hand, typically get my act together around the second week in December and have the audacity to print our names on the card rather than sign them myself - even though totally I agree with all those people (like Christy - who made a concession for just this once) who say it's tacky and sends the message that you couldn't be bothered to take the time to write your own name. The truth is, I would do it if I could, but these days the whole idea of finding any more time to put towards Christmas cards could scare me away from sending them at all. Hopefully the recipients can forgive me for this minor indisgretion. But I digress...

Being up so late at night has my mind wandering a bit. I've finished the other designs and layouts I had in the works for this evening, so here's what seems to be helping to keep me up until the printer stops:

1) I really need to get my act together and start thinking about this new baby's room. I have a few ideas, but the poor thing is definitely ranking as "sloppy seconds" on our priority list, which is just plain wrong. Her room is full of boxes from our move that have yet to be emptied or at least relocated, I have no idea what kind of furniture I am going to pick up, and the obsession with which I pursued Caroline's bedding when she was on her way is no longer in existence. I am waiting for an epiphany. As my doctor said at my 28-week appointment on Tuesday, if you have a diaper, a onesie, and a bassinet, you are pretty much set for the first little bit. I know he is right, but I am still determined to not let #2 turn into an afterthought...

2) I am pissed at my Shu Uemura eyelash curler. It has inexplicably broken, a fact that I discovered when I pried it off of my lashes the other day and found them crimped like a bad 80's hairdo. I tried to pick up a new one at Neiman Marcus when I went to my salon nearby to get my hair cut and highlighted yesterday, but they don't sell them there (unbelievably). My eyelash curler is one of my top three items in my make-up case, and the Shu Uemura one really is the best (I have tried them all). Sometimes, I don't agree with the beauty critics when they rave about a certain tool or product (i.e. - What is the BFD with Mabelline Great Lash mascara? I have tried it many times and still don't understand the obsession...), but they are spot-on about this one. My curler is kind of a staple to my morning routine, even when I don't even have time to shower, so it goes without saying that it needs to be replaced - like, yesterday.

See? Even Jodie Foster isn't excited about crimped hair...

3) I'm excited to decorate our house for the holidays. When we bought it, even my Jewish husband Steve thought it had the perfect spot for a Christmas tree (right in the front window of our living room), and couldn't wait to put lights up (even then, the neighborhood just felt like the kind of place where people get into the spirit of things). We buy a real tree, and it's from a stand run by a really nice family at the Catholic church where I grew up and went to grade school. Caroline is getting into the holiday for the first time, which is really cute. I'm trying to temper the whole Santa-which-gets-out-of-hand thing by explaining that it's really a birthday party for a baby named Jesus, but as one of my other best friends Kristy mentioned, she'll probably still miss the meaning and focus on the fact that she might get cake at said party. She knows my two-year-old so well...

Okay, so my printing is done. Now my mind is wandering towards thoughts of sleep. Thanks for staying up with me!

BECAUSE I JUST CAN'T SHAKE THE TEACHER IN ME...

...I just think this is the most fabulous little gift for any beginning writer! I was looking around a really cute site this evening, The Silly Wagon, and stumbled across this stamper in the "Goodies" section. You can choose either an upper/lower case version, or just upper cases. I just love the fact that you can start getting kids to practice writing their names with some guidance but without having to sit there and draw out those little dotted letters yourself. They are great for signing thank-you notes after birthdays and as a take-along when you know you are going to have to wait somewhere. I'm thinking of picking one up just in time for pre-school next fall!

PARTY-PLANNING MADE EASY...

Here's Caroline on her first birthday this past Summer -

a seemingly small event to plan. Wait until she gets older

and she actually knows what's going on...

This morning, I got my daily newsletter in my inbox from Urban Baby. They had an article about planning the perfect Easter party for kids, with a great link I wanted to share with you. It's for a party-planning site called Peppers and Pollywogs, which is a place to get all kinds of really fabulous ideas for different kinds of parties - from birthdays for kids of all ages, to christenings, to holiday parties for everyone. The site is particularly great because it's sorted into sections that include "goodie bags," "invitations," and "music suggestions." You also can browse vendors by city (if you are interested in hiring one), or email a request for help to come up with an invitation rhyme (albeit for a fee...). As stationery designers and co-owners of Penny-Bear Printing, my partner Christy and I deal regularly with parents who are planning events for their kids. I think Peppers and Pollywogs is an awesome resource for all of us!

A CLEVER CUPCAKE KEEPER...

I was poking around Williams Sonoma this afternoon and found this really smart product that helps prevent cupcake casualties when in transport (even if it flips upside down!):

This is perfect for sending your child to school with a special treat for her birthday or other celebration. What a great way to get a cupcake from point A to point B without losing your icing (because we all know that would be a huge tragedy...)!

TWO REALLY COOL TOOLS...

So I found two really cool tools that I thought that The Pink Totebag audience would find useful. I'll preface this by saying that I was definitely not the first one to discover and share these tools - for that, I'll give credit to the authors who first passed them along on their two other fun blogs (because even though I know they're out there for public consumption by their publishers, these bloggers deserve the credit for feeding them to the masses)...

First, on Gnome Sweet Gnome (and no, that's not a reference to the statue/trophy my husband steve won at our last annual beer-pong tournament although that's a fun coincedence!), the blogger Olivia posted about this awesome calculator at Domino.com that helps you figure out how much fabric you need, wallpaper, or how much paint to buy to finish a home decorating project. I took a look at it (as we're in the slow process/discussion of renovating our house) and it was really helpful and easy to use! Happy re-upholstering!

The second is one that I found via Oh Happy Day! where blogger Jordan posted about this fabulous route planner/calculator for running, walking, and jogging. You can literally zoom in on your neighborhood, use the mouse to map out your route, and it pops out not only the distance for you, but also calories burned according to your weight (and some other stuff, too!). ALL FOR FREE! You can also save your routes, or easily find new ones in your area that you can try. My husband was so excited to find out that he burns 352 calories on his morning walks with our daughter. Now if only the visit to Starbucks midway could be counted as some sort of a "refueling" stop, life would be golden...