THE FINAL COUNTDOWN...

With less than two weeks to go until the arrival of "Baby Tummy" (as Caroline continues to call her), we are in full-swing trying to get things as ready as we can. I head in for a scheduled c-section on the 18th, which is fast-approaching! It still seems a bit strange to me that we actually have anything left to do. When Caroline was born, we were ready to go weeks before she actually arrived - I think I had myself convinced that if everything was in place then we would totally know what we were doing once this little foreign creature moved into our home full-time.

This time, I feel like we know better - the confidence we have regarding how to actually keep this little person alive and thriving makes it seem just a bit less important to make sure that every throw pillow is in place in the glider and that every room decoration is arranged just so. Combine confidence with the fact that we have a toddler running about and you now know why the painter is just now scheduled to come paint the nursery on Friday - exactly 1 1/2 weeks before the baby will be born (if she decides not to make her presence known any earlier than that)! Oh well - it will all fall into place. Having Caroline taught me that...

From the perspective of my wheelchair, I think I've been pretty lucky with this pregnancy. With Caroline, she was arriving in the late summer, which meant I had to endure alot of heat and humidity in the weeks leading up to her birth. My body was incredibly swollen, which is common in pregnancy but particularly of issue for women who are in chairs. Limited mobility means limited ways to relieve the fluid retention. My ankles and legs were huge towards the end, and I was so swollen all over that I developed carpal tunnel syndrome in my hands and wrists and couldn't feel my fingers a good deal of the time. Not only was it really uncomfortable; it also began to affect my ability to use my hands - writing by hand became almost impossible (I even had to be incredibly tacky and type my thank-you notes for my baby shower), transferring into my chair was really painful, and taking my chair apart to put it into the car was harder and harder every day. The perk to all of this, however, was that when I finally delivered, I lost so much water weight right away that I was well on my way to my pre-pregnancy weight - gotta look at the bright side, right?!

My issues with swelling, and specifically the carpal tunnel syndrome, made me initially reluctant to even have a second baby. Thankfully, however, this journey has been different! While I was initially nervous to have a winter baby, the toll this pregnancy has taken on my body has been far less dramatic. I've had swelling recently in my legs and feet, but nothing that I haven't felt I couldn't handle. And to my relief, the carpal tunnel syndrome that I dreaded has been non-existent. I am so glad that things have gone differently this time around, especially with Caroline to keep up with. It's also really nice to feel like we know what we're doing - we've got alot of the little tricks figured out where a newborn is concerned. Now if anyone could hand me an owner's manual for my toddler, we will be all set!

THE BABY'S ROOM (AKA MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION)...

As I headed into the new year, I swore to myself that January was going to be entitled "Get Ready for #2," starting with making some decisions about the new baby's room. Well, like clockwork, I woke up on New Year's Day in pretty much a panic - or should we call it nesting mode?! I headed straight to Pottery Barn Kids and finally made some decisions about the direction in which I want to head.

Basics-wise, we needed to buy a new crib, since we've decided to keep Caroline in hers for as long as humanly possible. I know her days in it are limited, but I have to say I find it to be such a relief that I can keep her in some sort of socially-acceptable cage for just a bit longer. :) We have a table that I am using as a changing table (the traditional ones aren't open underneath, which makes them tricky for my wheelchair), and Caroline's new room has built-in drawers, which means the armoire we used in her nursery at the old house is up for grabs. The swivel glider that's currently in the corner of her room is going to move into the baby's room, as well.

As much as I've been complaining about getting myself in gear about this room, now that I'm working on some of the creative parts of it, I'm getting excited! Caroline's nursery was somewhat preppy, with a cute seersucker patchwork bumper and a variety of pastels. Weirdly enough, I fell in love with this bedding that I think resembles Anthropologie a bit more than Ralph Lauren. I have more decisions to make about window coverings (I'm leaning towards blackout shades with simple white drapes), paint color, rug, and any additional storage we might need, but I'm feeling pretty good about where things are headed! Here are some of the purchases or ideas I've had so far...

BEDDING

I decided on the Brooke quilt and bumper, but decided to forgo the sheets, bedskirt, etc. that went with it - it was all a bit too much and I'm certain it would have had emotional and/or psychological ramifications should #2 have had to stare at it every day for the next few years (hee hee). We're just going to go with some plain jersey sheets and a solid bed skirt that coordinates.

FURNITURE

We're using Caroline's swivel glider, but it's not covered in blue. Instead, it's the green chenille that you'll see in the swatch below (it just needs a really good cleaning!).

I bought the Kendall crib (below) on New Year's day - it was on sale for $300 less than it is usually priced! They had to do a little bit of searching to find it in white, but my girls at PBK can work magic, it seems. The Berkley armoire that we purchased for Caroline's nursery is also going in the baby's room.

ACCESSORIES AND DECOR
I just thought these little coordinating owls were too cute. They were also on sale, so I picked them up, too! Caroline thinks one is the big sister and one is the little sister. The hatching chick art (below) is something I'm debating, but I don't know what we're painting the room yet, so it might just be too much green. We'll see!

RANDOM THOUGHTS...

So I am sitting here in my den, and it's 12:30 in the morning. I'm working to print a stationery order for my best friend and business partner Christy, who just had her third adorable baby. She and I timed this whole pregnancy thing perfectly, didn't we? Our newest kids will be close enough in age to hopefully be the best of friends like their mommies, while at the same time there's one of us available to hold down the fort with our company while the other gives birth/recovers. I'm really excited about how her announcement/Christmas card has turned out (I mean, they are such a cute family that coming up with a design and layout was easy):

I want to be able to get these to her tomorrow so that she could send them out ASAP - she's the friend who literally times it so that her card arrives before anyone else's on the first day of December, so it's practically killing her that they are not out yet. She pays no mind that she had a c-section literally nine days ago. I, on the other hand, typically get my act together around the second week in December and have the audacity to print our names on the card rather than sign them myself - even though totally I agree with all those people (like Christy - who made a concession for just this once) who say it's tacky and sends the message that you couldn't be bothered to take the time to write your own name. The truth is, I would do it if I could, but these days the whole idea of finding any more time to put towards Christmas cards could scare me away from sending them at all. Hopefully the recipients can forgive me for this minor indisgretion. But I digress...

Being up so late at night has my mind wandering a bit. I've finished the other designs and layouts I had in the works for this evening, so here's what seems to be helping to keep me up until the printer stops:

1) I really need to get my act together and start thinking about this new baby's room. I have a few ideas, but the poor thing is definitely ranking as "sloppy seconds" on our priority list, which is just plain wrong. Her room is full of boxes from our move that have yet to be emptied or at least relocated, I have no idea what kind of furniture I am going to pick up, and the obsession with which I pursued Caroline's bedding when she was on her way is no longer in existence. I am waiting for an epiphany. As my doctor said at my 28-week appointment on Tuesday, if you have a diaper, a onesie, and a bassinet, you are pretty much set for the first little bit. I know he is right, but I am still determined to not let #2 turn into an afterthought...

2) I am pissed at my Shu Uemura eyelash curler. It has inexplicably broken, a fact that I discovered when I pried it off of my lashes the other day and found them crimped like a bad 80's hairdo. I tried to pick up a new one at Neiman Marcus when I went to my salon nearby to get my hair cut and highlighted yesterday, but they don't sell them there (unbelievably). My eyelash curler is one of my top three items in my make-up case, and the Shu Uemura one really is the best (I have tried them all). Sometimes, I don't agree with the beauty critics when they rave about a certain tool or product (i.e. - What is the BFD with Mabelline Great Lash mascara? I have tried it many times and still don't understand the obsession...), but they are spot-on about this one. My curler is kind of a staple to my morning routine, even when I don't even have time to shower, so it goes without saying that it needs to be replaced - like, yesterday.

See? Even Jodie Foster isn't excited about crimped hair...

3) I'm excited to decorate our house for the holidays. When we bought it, even my Jewish husband Steve thought it had the perfect spot for a Christmas tree (right in the front window of our living room), and couldn't wait to put lights up (even then, the neighborhood just felt like the kind of place where people get into the spirit of things). We buy a real tree, and it's from a stand run by a really nice family at the Catholic church where I grew up and went to grade school. Caroline is getting into the holiday for the first time, which is really cute. I'm trying to temper the whole Santa-which-gets-out-of-hand thing by explaining that it's really a birthday party for a baby named Jesus, but as one of my other best friends Kristy mentioned, she'll probably still miss the meaning and focus on the fact that she might get cake at said party. She knows my two-year-old so well...

Okay, so my printing is done. Now my mind is wandering towards thoughts of sleep. Thanks for staying up with me!

THE PINK TOTEBAG IS GETTING A LITTLE BIT "PINK"ER - AND AT JUST THE RIGHT TIME...

Caroline's future sister!!!

When we went for our "big" ultrasound this week, we got some really wonderful news! In addition to the baby looking healthy, with all its parts well formed and apparently in good working order (thank God!), we also found out that we will be adding another little girl to our family. Caroline will be getting a sister, which is something I have always dreamt of for her. I have 3 younger sisters myself, and there is truly nothing that can compare to that kind of bond. I know that if the baby had been a boy, I would have been so happy that things were as they should be (not to mention - Steve would have been thrilled to have a son and is feeling a bit outnumbered in our house these days). Caroline would have been a terrific big sister to her little brother, but I can't even put into words how I feel now that I know that she is getting a gift that I feel so blessed to be giving her - that of a sister.

This wonderful news couldn't have come at a better time for us. This time of year is bittersweet for me, as it has been for an unbelievable 19 years. While September is typically filled with the sights, sounds, and smells of impending Fall and all the newness and change that it brings, it also happens to be the month when I sustained my spinal cord injury. In particular, today - September 28 - is my anniversary. When I was 13, I had a spinal fusion for scoliosis. During surgery, a number of complications arose and a portion of my spinal cord was deprived of oxygen. When the doctors realized that the monitoring they had been doing to prevent just such an issue was not working properly, they removed the rods that had been placed along my spine, but the damage had been done, and I was paralyzed from roughly the belly button down.

Recovery from something like this takes a long time, but my yardstick for measuring mine hasn't ever really focused on the physical side of things. Sure, it's important to work to regain as much movement as you can to optimize your situation, and I spent a great deal of time in physical therapy over the years to heal. However, for me, the emotional journey that this experience has set out for me has been a far more difficult path to navigate at times. The anxiety and anticipation of all life's wonderful rights of passage, like dating, high school dances, starting college, getting married, or having a baby to name but a few, has always been compounded by the fact that I have this extra baggage in the form of four wheels.

It is a journey that I would not be able to face day in and day out without the support of my own sisters (along with the rest of my family and friends). This makes me value the future relationship that Caroline will have with hers so much. I know that when I was injured, they too were hurt and had to begin their own healing processes. I have the physical scars from my surgery and its aftermath, but the three of them also lost alot on the day I got hurt. They have always been there to help pick me up when I've fallen, both emotionally and physically. They help me turn limits into opportunities, and for that I am so grateful. I only hope that I return the favor to them in my own way. I am so lucky to have them, and I am a better person because of them.

My sisters and me

Like a really bad college roommate (not that I've ever had that!), my injury and I have reached an uneasy tolerance of each other while at the same time maintaining an extremely close proximity. We get in each other's way at times, and are constantly having to find ways to coexist. My chair and the limits it attempts to place on me are what I deal with every day, although I like to think that I push back hard to not let it stop me or my family from living our lives. I have to say that at this point in my life, I have reached an appreciation for the experience that I've been through, as it has helped me to learn things about myself that I don't think I ever would have learned otherwise. That isn't to say that I would even wish it on my worst enemy, but at the very least I can frame what happened to me in some sort of positive light.

Anyway, tonight, I just wanted to give a little shout-out to all the sisters (and future sisters) out there. They get us through some tough times, and for me especially, I had the opportunity on this anniversary to not spend too much time being sad about what happened so long ago, but instead focus on the future and all the hope and promise that it brings...